I'm still in bandages but my leg's nearly healed, and I've got a few decent walkies in now the nurses have said its ok to remove the bandages before they get here - shoes on, freedom! Briefly at least, but I'm generally being more active, which is helping the blood sugars & weight loss, meaning I have more energy & thus more brains :)

So I've been reading linguistic books and general language overviews and rediscovered conlangs - constructed languages, Klingon, Quenya (elvish), and more useful ones like Interlingua which is easy to read for me with knowing so many European languages. Found a book called The Language Construction Kit and was just reading it for interest, but the lure of making up my own language was too tempting, so I've started with that. And yes, grammar can be fun, especially when you're working out which elements to borrow from which language (word order, cases or no cases etc). The book is fab and very clear, the most fun is my brain putting together simple sentences with a limited vocab the way I do when learning a new language but then using that to discover what the rules are, whee! Mix of organic and more structured creation, tis fascinating :)

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Whee! Played the piano, first time this year, bit of Fur Elise, bit of the Prelude in C & then sight read the accompaniment to one of the Schubert songs I can still remember from singing lessons in my teens, Heidenröslein - in the shower a few weeks back I rediscovered my voice, as in it did what I wanted with tone and power rather than being weak & wavery. Must sing more, I've always fancied playing & singing classical stuff :)

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Its over a month since Kithra died & there really needs to be a less traumatic post to top my lj, so this'll have to be it :)

Things are a lot better - still sad about Kithra but I put a new baby bookcase on the desk where her tank was & that's helped a lot, no huge obvious gap there, plus it was fun sorting through books in various places & those shelves are now my "to read" pile, which is supremely well-organised a thing if I do say so myself.

Healthwise the leg is much better, still got a wound there that's had various dressings, was great last week because I was down to a simple patch & no bandages so didn't feel like an egyptian mummy in training & could get my shoes on & go for a walk when I felt like it. Sadly this week I'm in compression bandages so the leg is strapped up again, I can't fit my shoe over them & I don't get a shower til Thursday, which is not making for a happy hobbit, though if it speeds up the healing its worth it. Dad had the same treatment, but he thought of it is a warm cuddle for his leg, personally I don't like shoes, socks, tights, trousers or anything at all on my feet & legs so its not a pleasant thing for me at all, ah well. At least the lack of bandages last week meant I could get out - to the dental hospital, got lots of unpleasant treatments ahead of me, ick ick. I got to the shop too, just Tesco but it made a change, hopefully I'll be up to something a bit more interesting/challenging soon, its been long enough since I did fun stuffs!

Definitely on the mend otherwise though, most days I've been doing my tai chi & either a walk or free weights, have played with my poi in the garden a few times too - can still do the moves I used to be able to do, still can't do the ones I couldn't, & flailing, though thankfully soft, poi still hit boobs, bum & bits when things go wrong, ow! :)

And I'm back into my music, been playing the ukulele a lot, got a fab tenor uke from mum & dad as my 40th birthday present, has an amazing sound, much richer and full-bodied than the normal rather shrill soprano ukes, and has really inspired me to learn new things, new songs and chords and techniques, its brilliant. Rob McKillop has a great series of books, his uke studies one is very versatile, really explores what you can do with the instrument, and his book of Gaspar Sanz baroque guitar pieces is equally fun :)

So horrible on Friday night, I opened Kithra's tank to top up her water, and she was stretched out at the back of the tank, presumably asleep. Except she didn't look quite right, so I poked her gently, expecting a wiggle and a glare and - nothing. Cold, lifeless snake *shudder*. Kithra's dead and I went completely to pieces. I loved that snake so much, we'd had her for 8 years in total & I expected her to last twice that or more, such a shock to lose her.

I managed to calm down and stop crying eventually, and be convinced it wasn't my fault in any way; she's been a well-loved snake over the years despite the odd mishap and panic (her accident as a baby, the fussy eating, trying to get the temperature & humidity right when the first winter with her set in..).

When Zebedee died I found him shortly afterwards, and didn't mind handling him, curling him up to snuggle into the hole I dug under the willow tree. The thought of touching Kithra again, even seeing her, was freaking me out so a panicked 3am chat with mum led to my poor dad on waking at 7am being given a box to remove her in.

We buried her, in a nice bio-degradable paper bag, under the lilac. I tried to dig the hole but I'm still so weak & wobbly from the infection that I couldn't lift the spadeful of dirt, so dad did the digging & burying, & we stood in the cold garden, birds singing overhead and the scent of fresh turned soil saying goodbye to a much loved slithery friend.

RIP Kithra, May 2004 - March 2012

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It was a funny old birthday last Saturday. At least I was home from hospital, but with being so ill I'd made no plans at all for celebrating - normally I get excited weeks ahead & pick out nice food to have, choose my present from mum & dad and generally make sure its an excellent day. Nice folks had sent presents, which was lovely, tanngrisnir picked a fab book as well as raiding my wishlist, diddler chose a very special wee statue symbolising friendship, & the family sent money. There was no cake though (scandalising ganimede when he heard, and it wasn't much to say its such an important age..

Still, I'm feeling much better now so can plan myself a second birthday when I'm up to enjoying it, and when my appetite's good enough to want tasty foods, and of course, cake (hopefully involving chocolate!)

Oh and I picked out a special present to have from mum & dad, phoned up about it & had a lovely geeky chat with the shop owner, should be in my sticky paws sometime this week - watch this space :)

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Home! Been home since Tuesday actually, but I'm still not myself. Nice to have my own bed, and privacy & choose my own food & company. Got district nurses coming to change the dressing on my leg still but I've finished the antibiotics at least. Yay own little house & doting parents :)

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Well, that's a whole week I've been in hospital now, beginning to get bored which is a good sign, and I'm definitely on the mend - have read a whole book, & ordered the sequel from amazon, and was listening to streaming music online & ended up getting the whole album via mp3 on my phone which is a novel concept, feeling very clever about that.

My friend Chris came in the oth'r night & said I've not looked this well in months so who knows how long I've been iller than we realised?

You certainly get to appreciate the little things in hospital, finally got to have a shower last night and wash my hair for the first time in a week, utter bliss, could have stayed there for hours, it wore me out tho, not rushing for another one quite yet.

My blood sugars are doing much better on the new meds, just need the leg to stop oozing & maybe they'll let me out, tho I still need some more iv antibiotics as the infection markers are down in the blood tests, but still present.

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I'm writing this from my hospital bed, been here since Friday when the gp got the blood test results, went eep at the high infection markers & ordered me up to A&E. Spent most os the night on a trolley tho they found a bed, if not a ward around 3am, & then I was moved to this ward on Saturday. The cellulitis had got really bad, started oozing as well - ick - but they've had me on intravenous antibiotics, which are wonderful things, am feeling miles better, pain is down, I can think clearly, still tired but not that drained feeling anymore.

They're trying to sort the diabetes too, which is great, blood sugars were way too high, though part of that is that I just couldn't get them to give me enough water, I drink 4 litres a day and that keeps things flowing nicely, was getting barely half that. Am happy now tho cos dad brought a big bottle in the other night, then Shirley brought a 6 pack of big bottles. Been glugging away happily & things are back on an even keel pee wise, yay :)

Doctor today said I need more iv antibiotics til the leg stops weeping,so I reckon I'm here for the week at least :( They've put me on new diabetes meds so fingers crosssed that'll help, the food is lousy - well ok, not to my taste - but I'm not hungry & don't seem to need to eat as much as usual so that's handy. Discovered I'm allergic to tuna, having disturbed everyone on Sunday night by throwing the tuna mayo sandwiches back up, blech.

So handy having the smartphone here to play with & chat to folks, when I'm not napping that is.

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I've been reading HP fanfic non-stop for the last 6 weeks now, found I can do so comfortably on my phone so I re-read old faves like Blood Magic & Stealing Harry & A Year Like None Other, and found in the interim since I last read a lot that other stories have been extended & completed (more Falling Further In, whee!). Other half-remembered ones have turned up via nifty googling, and I discovered tons more amazing novel length works - well, 6 weeks of several hours a day.

The one I can't find, and I'm hoping someone out there recognises, is a post-Hogwarts Harry/Snape tale set a good decade later. Harry is teaching, & comes across a sealed room containing the body of Snape, either in a magic coma or frozen or something. He revives him & has to deal with a man no longer much older than him.. Ring any bells for anyone?

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First post of 2012 and we're nearly in February. That has to a be record of un-communicativeness even for me.

Yes, I'm still here, as the odd FB update will prove - those not on FB aren't missing much except "proof of life" updates, the rambling bouncy friendly hobbit is still taking a break from most things sociable, though I have my moments.

Health is *still* sucking, I worked out that having all the stress and strain of doing the OU course last year on top of my parent's health and needing to do more household stuff *on top of* breaking up with Forest means that rather than 2011 being the year of recovering and starting over, the body and mind have decided 2012 is it instead. Which probably explains why all I've wanted to do for weeks is lounge around reading Harry Potter fanfic. Having nasty colds, and bugs, and now last week coming down with cellulitis (thank deity for antibiotics) hasn't helped matters either..

Giftmas was challenging as we were all quite tired and ill, I was determined we'd celebrate somewhat though, and so we had a proper turkey dinner, even if I did get so stressed out and shaky I had to break off halfway through and go and have coffee and choc and a general chillout before returning to cook the rest of it (damn tasty too, even if we've all got less appetite these days - not being so stuffed you don't want to move is no bad thing mind! ) We were also a bit low on funds, so I bought my own electric guitar and hooked it up to the shiny new portable MicroCube amp I bought last year and never got round to trying (sigh), getting an enormous amount of pleasiure from going back to basics and just working out what makes pretty noises, though I've learnt to play a smidgen of Pink Floyd's Shine On You Crazy Diamond which makes me very happy. I got books and choc and some dvds and generally felt well-loved and provided for which is all that matters at Giftmas or indeed the rest of the year.

Imbolc is coming up which is usually the point I begin to waken from winter hibernation, mainly because the days are getting longer, though I'm very good at getting up at a regular time these days, and am just taking each day as it comes with no expectations, no hassle, just got to shower and dress and feed myself and anything beyond that is a bonus, feel like I'm recovering from.. well, everything.. and that's not something that can be rushed.

I'll be 40 next month, and it doesn't feel that old at all, though I've no clue how I'll be marking the occasion...

Anyways, yes, here's me peeking in from the wasteland and saying hello, before wandering off again. You know where I am if you want me :)